Level Unlocked: Crisis Point

It’s one month since Indian Country Today Media Network unexpectedly went on hiatus and ceased active operations. I’m in trouble. Most frustrations I have are not unique even as a multiply-disabled doubly neurodiverse Nanticoke and Lenni-Lenape Native American WOC, but they are humiliating.

https://storify.com/MochaLisaccino/crisis-point

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STORIFY: Depression, Disability, and WOC #disabledWOC

 

When not being summarily ignored and erased, WOC on Twitter discussing Depression and other forms of Neurodiversity and Disabilities are routinely shamed for not being the “strong” women we are stereotyped as by WP and other POC. *ANGER AS AN INDICATOR OF DISTRESS* is never considered.

 

READ THE FULL TWITTER STORIFY
by me as @CreativeAspie

Another #invisibleillness #Disability Diagnosis: Gilbert’s Syndrome

Gilbert’s Syndrome is another complex invisible illness / disability I was diagnosed with. It is a condition that goes a long way into explaining why many medical treatments and diet changes don’t work for me. Unfortunately no GP wants to document it, including the one who make the discovery.

The problem is that conventional medical wisdom dictates that GS is harmless despite suggested heredity links. However, there are studies that show that those diagnosed with the condition have the many of the same debilitating chronic illnesses in common (ex: IBSFatigue), the risk of recurring bouts of jaundice aside.

Following is a link to a UK-based GS Patients support organisation.

http://www.gilbertssyndrome.org.uk

@CreativeCrip #Aspergers Referral

NEWZ!!

I’ve been referred to an #‎Aspergers‬ Specialist. I will see her several times in next month!

AND: Im with a Primary Care Mental Health Team. No changing staff like the old Community Mental Health Team. This Specialist is said to be the best in my area. They will be looking  at Bipolar too instead of the Major Depression diagnosis I currently have (manic episodes are contradicting that and the 200mg Sertraline daily does nothing for them).

 IMPORTANT NOTE:

The Disability / Mental Health  Assessor said it was vitally important to look at & treat the WHOLE person rather than looking at everything piecemeal. In her opinion the reason why CBT FAILED is because no one has considered anything but Major Depression and/or me being a hypochondriac when I have other health problems that are well-documented. She also couldn’t believe that no one I’d seen so far in last 3-4 years didn’t think to ask ME what *I* thought about my disabilities / problems! She said flat-out that CBT isn’t the cure-all for everything & especially for people with complex disability & illness.

If I am an Aspie – then other health issues could be sorted out simply by addressing that – CBT won’t help me.

@CreativeCrip Test Result: Ritvo #Autism #Aspergers Diagnostic Scale-Revised #Aspie

This particular Autism / Asperger Syndrome result can be seen online HERE

Scores with a yellow background are above the test threshold values. If your total score is above the threshold it may be worth getjavascript:;ting professionally assessed.

Total score Language Social relatedness Sensory/motor Circumscribed interests
Test taken by you on 10 June 2013 207.0 19.0 104.0 48.0 36.0
Test taken by you on 31 July 2013 210.0 21.0 93.0 57.0 39.0
Your average score is 208.5 20.0 98.5 52.5 37.5
Threshold values for suspected ASD 65.0 4.0 31.0 16.0 15.0
The average score for males with ASD (368 people took this test) 140.8 11.1 69.8 33.5 26.5
The average score for females with ASD (228 people took this test) 165.0 13.1 77.7 42.5 31.7
The average score for males with suspected ASD (1591 people took this test) 146.9 11.3 75.4 32.7 27.6
The average score for females with suspected ASD (1560 people took this test) 152.0 11.5 74.0 37.1 29.4
The average score for male neurotypicals (505 people took this test) 83.8 6.6 44.7 17.2 15.2
The average score for female neurotypicals (615 people took this test) 77.1 5.2 38.9 18.9 14.1

Average scores

If you wish to find out more about this test you can read the original research paper here

Click here to take this test yourself

Click here for a list of the available tests

 

@CreativeCrip Rdos #Aspergers Test Result #Aspie

Your Aspie score: 185 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 37 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie

RDOS ASPIE QUIZ_2013.07.31 (PDF)

Rdos Asperger's Test Result Graphic (http://www.rdos.net/)

Rdos Asperger’s Test Result Graphic (http://www.rdos.net/)

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On Writing and Depression: My Creative Down-swings

Jason Arnopp @JasonArnopp  (Author, scriptwriter. Doctor Who, Sarah Jane, Friday 13th) is working on a book regarding professional (Fiction) writers and Depression. He asked me to contribute. This is what I had to say…

————–

On Writing & Depression: Creative Down-swings

A well-meaning new-found long-lost relative decided to comment on my NaNoWriMo 2011 Facebook entry referring to my struggles to participate because of Major Depression: “truth is I’m strategic…” she wrote. “…the goal is achievable you have to trust yourself to make it happen.” Her sentiments are typical of the simple-minded inspiration porn that I am forced to put up with routinely. My response is always that I do what I can, when I can, but unfortunately more often than not it means struggling immensely to do not very much at all. I give myself pep talks and formulate strategies to try and be productive to no avail.

The greatest irony for me as a writer living with Depression has always been that I get my best ideas and am the most prolific when in a severe down-swing. I find that writing fiction, even Harry Potter fan fiction, is therapeutic in a way that Cognitive Behavioural Therapy has never been for me. I even managed to put this into one of my stories with a fan fiction-writing protagonist who proposed that “sometimes fiction serves a purpose in enabling people to live out their fantasies, purge their own demons or perhaps set a standard for themselves. It was only when people confused fantasy with reality that there was a problem.”Self-insertion? I won’t deny it. I’ve learned an awful lot about myself and my illness through writing and making use of my own lived experience (especially post-diagnosis in 2009). This in turn informs others including those who live with it – something still sorely needed to combat the stigma of mental illness. I would also agree that I lose myself in the gloriousness of creation process. This is even more pronounced during manic cycles of insomnia. Perhaps that’s why I have so many epic tales that remain unfinished after starting them nearly a decade ago and have failed to live up to the potential I’ve been told that I have. Depression has impacted every aspect of my life for good or ill, and my interests and ambitions as a professional writer are no exception.

Lisa J. Ellwood

@CreativeCrip (Social Justice, Mental Illness, Disability)

https://thecreativecrip.wordpress.com/

@IconicImagery (Professional Writing & Communications account)

http://iconic-imagery.co.uk/

http://iconicimagery.wordpress.com/

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/598860/NativeMoon (Fan Fiction Writing)

Related Articles:

#NaNoWriMo 2011 (#disability #spoonie #mentalhealth) – #amwriting (thecreativecrip.wordpress.com

#NaNoWriMo – Day 2: Not #fitforwork or anything else… (thecreativecrip.wordpress.com

@CreativeCrip in the media: #xmasathome #nyeathome interview GRAZIA Australia (thecreativecrip.wordpress.com

@CreativeCrip in the media: #xmasathome #nyeathome interview GRAZIA Australia

NEW at thecreativecrip.com

I was interviewed recently for Grazia Australia regarding the #xmasathome #nyeathome Twitter campaign for people who are alone during the Holidays. Writer/Editor Vanessa Lawrence (@NessLawrence) gave me a great Christmas present in the form of a PDF of the final article as it appeared in print.

You can read it HERE

Related articles:

#xmasathome, #nyeathome and #virtualnye 2012: In Defense of Humbug

 

I was interviewed recently for Grazia Australia regarding the #xmasathome #nyeathome Twitter campaign for people who are alone at Chistmas.

What Jay Smooth says in this vlog from 2009 sums up my general attitude about the Holidays perfectly.

 

#xmasathome, #nyeathome & #virtualnye 2012: @CreativeCrip suspended by Twitter, change of plan

I’m always alone and attempted suicide Christmas 2009.

Last year marked the first of what is turning out to be an annual Twitter event in supporting those of us who are either literally alone for the Holidays or feel isolated for whatever reason. Started by @prestontowers of prestoninstitute.com, I tweeted #xmasathome #nyeathome 2011 support as @Creative Crip  and blogged here about it.

New Year’s Eve was a bigger effort. Not onlydid I blog here (a few times in fact), I also did a feature on my latent Crip Island Posterous Blog replete with photos taken in-world during my own corresponding #VirtualNYE campaign event in the virtual world (aka metaverse) Second Life linked into a Google Hangout celebrating the new year as it was rung in across the globe.

Yesterday I woke up to the bitter reality of my @Creative Crip account being suspended without warning yet again. At first I decided to not bother, simply because of the significance of the @CreativeCrip identity to me and to others who rely on me for support. My mind was changed by sleeping on it and getting a few tweets from my followers. I was reminded of how many people look to me as a source of strength online despite my own fragility. I prefer to keep my Twitter activity compartmentalised, but when it comes to something like #xmasathome #nyeathome #virtualnye, keeping an eye on the bigger picture is vital.

So this year I’ll be tweeting support from @IconicImagery, the account for my Marketing Communications business and my new @GamerFems project (gaming, metaverse, feminism and all manner of geekery). I’ll also have another post or two about #VirtualNYE 2012-2013 in the next few days. The support is the thing that matters regardless of which account it comes from. So let it be written, so let it be done.

That’s how I roll.

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